James and Michelle Hayes
The Crisis love story - 18 years of volunteering between them
It was Christmas, back in 2003, I was single, living by myself in a flat. I was fed up and just thought "I've got to get out of the house". I couldn't bear another year of sitting in, staring at the walls, I had to get out and do something.
I looked online for volunteering opportunities and Crisis came up. I had no idea what it was about but decided to give it a go and put myself up for volunteering at any centre for any shift.
I was given the night shift. I walked in and was really overwhelmed at how well the guests were treated and respected, and at all the services and activities that are put on for them. It was equally warm and welcoming for the volunteers. After years of spending Christmas alone, I was hit by how friendly the centre was. The volunteers, who came from all walks of life, had a real sense of community among them; there would be 19 year-old Rastafarians working alongside 75 year-old nuns. And the willingness of everyone to get their hands dirty, literally, is amazing. It was about 3 am and everyone was really tired. The shift leader asked "who's prepared to go and clean some toilets?" and just about everyone put their hands up. I was overwhelmed by how everyone wanted to help. It was really interesting that nobody was being paid but they were so committed to making this a success. I just really wanted to be a part of it.
I'm now a shift leader for the nights. Night shifts are great because you end up in the most in-depth conversations in the early hours of the morning whilst everyone is sleeping, you really get to know everyone. People pour their hearts out.
That's where I met Michelle. We didn't get together straight away, we were friends at first and would have a real laugh on our shifts together, trying to match-make volunteers when things were quiet. We got on really well and spent a lot of time talking. We stayed in touch after one Christmas and it just went from there. The wedding was less than a year later in New Zealand, Michelle's home country.
Christmas was always an emotionally difficult time for me. I was never close to my family when I was growing up, I had a difficult childhood. Before volunteering I would spend the festive time alone. But Crisis has become my Christmas family; it means a lot to both of us, it's funny how things can change so dramatically.